As a recent transplant to The Big Apple straight from undergrad, I was a fledgling novice to a dating scene that was a far cry from the simplicity I had experienced in my small town just outside of Fort Worth, Texas. Nevertheless, I was looking forward to putting myself out there since the only guy I had ever really ‘dated’ was my college boyfriend of 3 years. Also, I only knew one person in New York, so I was anxious to delve into some sort of social life.
To hop back in the saddle, I joined Match.com after settling into my cozy studio
closet apartment in Bushwick. It was here that I met Chase, a strapping 30 year-old financial consultant who lived in SoHo. I am not sure if I was intimidated or intrigued by him, but whatever the case, I did find life a bit more fascinating with him in it.
Being from a provincial little town in Texas, the extent of my nights out were dining at some kind of burger joint or taco stand followed by a dive bar with specials that consisted of $2 PBR/shots of Jameson. Perhaps I was a fish out of water living in this new city, but I tend to appreciate the more simple things.
Chase was clearly on the complete opposite end of the spectrum and definitely enjoyed a more extravagant lifestyle than I was accustomed to. Our first outing was at the Hudson Hotel Terrace, a place with breathtaking views of Manhattan and drinks that could easily consume my entire week’s paycheck. Being the polite southerner that I am, I offered to split the check when the bill came but was secretly relieved when he denied my offer because had he not, I don’t know how I would have eaten for the remainder of the month.
I suppose Chase found my simplicity endearing because he insisted I accompany him to a colleagues birthday party the following evening to which I accepted his invitation.
When I arrived at an establishment called 1OAK, I definitely stuck out like a sore thumb. Sporting my flats and dainty lace sundress I was drowning amongst a sea of women donning tight leather mini skirts, sequin drenched crop tops and sky high stilettos. I remained confident and had fun with Chase though it was clearly not my usual scene.
Despite our differences, Chase invited me to the Hamptons for the weekend with his friends as they had rented a beach house for Memorial Day. I was especially excited because the only Hamptons experience I ever thought I would possess was on an episode of Real Housewives.
I accepted, but not wanting to be presumptuous, I asked how much my share would cost me to which he replied, “Oh, don’t worry about it.”
So I didn’t, and I had an amazing weekend with Chase in the Hamptons. We laid out on the beach during the day, grilled bratwursts in the afternoon and enjoyed alcoholic beverages at the beach clubs in the evenings.
Coming back to reality was a difficult task after such an amazing weekend with the new man in my life.
And then I received it. A Venmo request from Chase.
With the entry level paycheck I was earning at the time, I would have to eat Ramen for weeks.
I quickly texted him and said that I didn’t have then money at that particular moment but I would figure out how to reimburse him for the weekend that HE invited me to and specifically told me ‘not to worry’ about. Because you know, eating is NBD.
“Ok, just maybe try to get it to me by the end of the month,” he said.
Not wanting to deal with the stress of being indebted to Chase, my only friend in New York was gracious enough to let me crash on his couch for 4 nights while I AirBnB’d my apartment to come up with the funds.
Chase continues to text me, but clearly I can’t afford his ass.