The WANT-trepreneur

I met Ronnie, a New Jersey native and self-proclaimed entrepreneur, on Bumble. After trading messages for the better part of the week, we agreed to meet for a cocktail on the rooftop of the Kimberly Hotel.

When I arrived Ronnie was comfortably situated at a sizable table probably capable of fitting up to 8 people. The waitress approached us to receive our drink order and kindly asked us if we would mind relocating to a smaller table for two because a bigger party was likely to come in for happy hour.

Before I could graciously grant her request Ronnie pretentiously said, ‘No,  I like it here just fine,’  complete with a shit-eating grin spread across his mildly attractive face.

Embarrassed, I encouraged him to move to a table across the way as I wanted to accommodate the waitress as a party of two had no business sitting at the largest table in the house.

I began sipping my Prosecco while Ronnie haughtily educated me about what a fabulously successful entrepreneur he was.

Many a times I attempted to change the topic from the monotony of the professional realm, but to no avail.

“So do you have siblings in the city? Do you see them often?” I asked.

“No, I don’t see my brother much. He is very competitive with me and has always been intimidated by my success. He does extremely well for himself as a lawyer, but I think he has always been envious of that fact that I did my own thing and became an self-made entrepreneur.  Also I don’t have much time to hang out with all my businesses I have to run.”

At this point I was so disinterested with his blatant arrogance that I began playing a drinking game with myself. Every time he would say the word ‘entrepreneur’ or ‘self-made’ I would drink. My delicious glass of refreshing Prosecco diminished within minutes.

Not wanting to have to sit through another minute of Ronnie contemptuously boasting about his accomplishments and success, I told him we should grab the bill.

“OK that’s a good idea,” he said. I gotta catch the train back anyway.”

“Catch the train? I thought you lived in the city.”

“Oh not right now. I moved back in with my folks in Jersey just because I am looking to buy a place and my lease was up.”

“So why didn’t you just get a sublease? There are so many available and isn’t it hard to look at properties in the city when you aren’t located in the city? Sounds like a pain in the ass.” I said.

“Well I am not looking just yet, I have so much to focus on with my businesses it is just tough to take care of an apartment and keep things clean and take care of utilities.”

“Interesting. I would think someone who is as successful as yourself would have a maid and a personal assistant take care of all that,” I said bitingly.

“Keeping your costs low and your profits high is really the key to being a great entrepreneur and that is what most people don’t understand.”

OK, Ronnie. Better get you back to your mom’s house now.




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